Lesbians Would Rather Solve Their Problems with a SWITCHBLADE!

7 02 2009

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UPDATED: The video clip is back, bitches! Man, fuck YouTube.

Since gay marriage is the worst thing ever—forever and ever, AMEN—23/6 has a slick new DIY on how to stop the sinners from sinning their sinny-sin-sins.
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Inauguration-Flavored Transitiony Goodness

16 01 2009

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It’s almost here, people! Come Tuesday, Hopey McChangerson will take the Oath of Office and we’ll have ourselves a brand-spankin’ new Presidente.

A lot is going on in the lead-up to the big day, including one long-overdue event this very night:

At 9:00 p.m. Friday, the highest-level staffers will turn in their gear; and the West Wing will become a ghost town. Chief of Staff Josh Bolten, Counselor Ed Gillespie, and Press Secretary Dana Perino are the senior staffers who will remain here, on standby. Monday is a federal holiday so the White House would be closed anyway. On Tuesday, Special Agent Donald White of the U.S. Secret Service will shadow President Bush, sit in the customary front ‘shotgun’ seat of the limousine, and guard the President until noon. At 12:01, Agent White steps over to a position behind Barack Obama.

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Palinroll’d!

8 01 2009

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I think I just got Palinroll’d.

I’m sifting through today’s snail mail when I see an envelope marked, ‘Office of the Governor of Alaska.’

WHAAAAAT?

My gut response was OH-SHIT-HIDE-SHE-FOUND-OUT-I-CALLED-HER-RETARDED-AND-SHE’S-GONNA-GUN-ME-DOWN-FROM-A-HELICOPTER!!!!111!one11!! confusion.

A) Why won’t this woman go away and B) what the hell am I doing on a distribution list for Alaska’s state office? Does written correspondence have an ‘UNSUBSCRIBE’ button?

After having Ralphie (didn’t know he’s SWAT dog now, didya?) screen for anthrax and explosives, I cracked this bad boy open only to find some good old SPAM:
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Oy.

8 01 2009

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The traffic plan for Inauguration Day is out:

Almost 3.5 square miles of downtown Washington will be closed to vehicular traffic starting at 15:00 (that’s 3:00 p.m., you philistine) on 19 January. Restrictions will end on the morning of 21 January.

DCist has the full deets.
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Used Condom Wants to Be Governor, Story Developing…

6 01 2009

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UPDATED post from a previous version.

No, no, no, no, NO.

Terry McAuliffe—one of the the 2008 election’s most insufferable boogeymenwants to be Virginia’s next governor.

Um… not in my yard. Look Terry, we hated you during the VA Democratic Primary because you’re a slimy, borderline-creepy, carpetbagging, Douchington fuckwit who can’t sit still and keep from yapping your pie-hole. That hasn’t changed.
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